Photographs by Lee Towndrow

Bill Bowerbird Scavenger Hunt

Tyler Burke April 25, 2017

I've been thinking about my old Santa Cruz activities today, partly inspired by an exchange in a parenting group on Facebook. I posted about the Bill Bowerbird Scavenger Hunt (Indigo, Yonge & Eglinton, May 27th), and it turned out one of the members had been to a Hallowe'en Santa Cruz on Captain John's Seafood Ship.

I said something like, "I hope it wasn't the one overrun by people, the one where mimes and carrots scaled the side of the ship to get to the decks," and she said "That was the one". She also told me her co-worker had mentioned it on the radio. Now I finally know how things went so spectacularly sideways.

Several people at the party were dressed as police officers, so when the real cops showed up I wasn't quite sure what to think, except that I was expecting them. Fortunately, they were good-humoured men, one of them may have danced a bit, and one of them posed for endless photographs with very drunk people.

More Uses for Duct Tape

Tyler Burke March 31, 2017

My studio was recently featured in a Now article about laneway workspaces. Yes, shamefully, that is duct tape for trim. I may have Photoshopped-out some unfinished wiring, also. The real wood trim was delivered last week (you can see it on the floor behind the sofa). Should only take me about two years to get that installed.

Here's an excerpt:

“It’s very serene,” she says of the studio. “You can hear the rain, the wind and the birds so distinctly, and on the best days I feel like I’m commuting to work in a little secret cabin.”

But it’s not perfect. For one, it’s a very solitary existence, but she meets up with her husband in the backyard sometimes for human stimulation. And there’s no running water, which would be useful for anyone using a paintbrush." The full article (which includes the studios of two other local artists) is here.

That Time I Was Hired to Write Ad Copy for Axe Body Spray

Tyler Burke March 25, 2017

I was recently asked to answer some questions by the venerable editors at Open Book, and I chose their Dirty Dozen format (or, 12 things you didn't know about me—which should in truth be a number approaching at least 437, because we're strangers like that).

In any case, after I sent off my answers, I thought of a thirteenth item. And not to put too fine a point on this late-breaking addition—it's just maybe the best thing I've ever written.

Years ago, I was hired as a copywriter for Axe Body Spray. I was initially hesitant (as any sane young woman might be), but damn it, I persisted. The client's brief requested some quippy lines for a scent which was only available in Canada during the summer. This is what I came up with:

"Axe Fever. Limited Edition. Unlimited Action."

I nailed it! Or I thought I had? Apparently I had so embodied my Axe writing role that I eclipsed the good taste of my audience: the Canadian market. My copy was rejected. It's likely nobody remembers the wobbly lines I wrote to replace that gem of a slogan, but how could I ever know? I don't know a single adult who buys this stuff (alas, I have no one to "axe").

And now I return to the original purpose of this post. If my 12 answers for Open Book don't interest you on face value alone, you could possibly use them to guess all my passwords? Right? Like those Facebook apps which are basically game-ponds for phishing. Here are my answers.

And here's Open Book's intro: