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That Time I Was Hired to Write Ad Copy for Axe Body Spray

I was recently asked to answer some questions by the editors at Open Book, and I chose their Dirty Dozen format (or, 12 things you didn't know about me—which should in truth be a number approaching at least 437, because we're strangers like that).

In any case, after I sent off my answers, I thought of a thirteenth item. And not to put too fine a point on this late-breaking addition—it's just possibly the best thing I've ever written.

Years ago, I was hired as a copywriter for Axe Body Spray. I was initially hesitant (as any sane young woman might be), but damn it, I persisted.  The client's brief requested some quippy lines for a scent which was only available in Canada during the summer. This is what I came up with:

"Axe Fever. Limited Edition. Unlimited Action."

I nailed it! Or I thought I had? Apparently I had so embodied my Axe writing role that I eclipsed the good taste of my audience: the Canadian market. My copy was rejected. It's likely nobody remembers the wobbly lines I wrote to replace that gem of a slogan, but how could I ever know? I don't know a single adult who buys this stuff (alas, I have no one to "axe").

And now I return to (or finally get to) the original purpose of this post. If my 12 answers for Open Book don't interest you on face value alone, you could possibly use them to guess all my passwords? Right? Like those Facebook apps which are basically game-ponds for phishing. Here are my answers.

And here's Open Book's intro:

She writes, she draws, she starts record labels -- is there anything Tyler Clark Burke can't do? The multi-hyphenate artist has now added another line to her impressive c.v. with the charming, wacky, colourful picture book Bill Bowerbird and the Unbearable Beak-Ache (OwlKids).

In the book, the titular Bill finds himself having a rough day with his very bad beak-ache, but with the help of some friends (including a zebra and yak) he learns about staying positive in tough times. Fun and vibrant, the book is creative and full of energy. It's also a neat way to talk about animals with the little ones in your life (bowerbirds are a fascinating species known for their colourful nests).

We're excited to have Tyler on Open Book today to take our Dirty Dozen challenge, which asks authors to share 12 unexpected facts about themselves. She tells us about one very hardcore way to get over a fear of public speaking, her family connection to The Maltese Falcon, and "the Winnipeg Raft Race". 

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Read my full list of arcana on Open Book here.